The Sanderson Gazette - 2009-12-01 - The Sanderson Gazette

It's been an excellent season so far, with ten teams still eligible for the Sanderson Cup playoffs. Less than 200 points separate the top and bottom scores; to put that in perspective, in 2007, more than 200 points separated the first- and second-place teams.

Now, rivals prepare to meet in the first-ever Blingaleague Rivalry Week. Who will make it into the playoffs with a chance to take home the beautiful Sanderson Cup? Who will win the coveted Old-School Timberwolves Hat or the FIFA XBOX game, two of the many rivalrous trophies at stake this weekend?

Weekly Recap

Derrek def. Ed, 105.29-96.63: D stays in control of his own destiny and denies Ed the chance to move into prime bye position with a good week.

Babel def. Rob, 132.65-95.83: Babel's team has a huge week a little too late to do his seasonal aspirations much good.

Allen def. Mike, 90.16-66.63: Mike lays an egg, putting his playoff hopes in serious trouble and allowing Allen to be a master of his own fate.

Pat def. Matt, 108.72-95.04: Pat, too, remains in control of his own playoff fate, denying Matt the chance to clinch a bye in the process.

Rabbit def. Dave, 105.95-102.11: Dave's valiant effort to upset Rabbit falls short, as Heath Miller can't squeeze out a few more points on Sunday night. Rabbit clinches a first-round bye as a result.

Pulley def. Kevin, 123.89-91.55: Like Babel, Pulley's heating up at the wrong time, having to settle for a spoiler role.

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums (Top Score): Bavaria Tatzelwurms (Babel), with an impressive 132.65 points.

Slapped Heartbeat (Low Score): Orton Hears a Boo (Mike), with a meager 66.63 points.

Start of the Week: Babel, who chose to play Devery Hederson and Percy Harvin over Torry Holt and Kevin Walter, and was rewarded with 21.47 and 23.97 points.

Misplay of the Week: from the same game, Rob, who started Beanie Wells (4.80 points) and Steve Slaton (12.23), when he could have played Fred Jackson (25.03) and Chester Taylor (16.10), instead.

Current Standings

  1. Rabbit+ (9-3)

  2. Matt* (8-4)

  3. Ed* (7-5)

  4. Rob* (7-5)

  5. Allen (6-6)

  6. Derrek (6-6)

  7. Pat (6-6)

  8. Kevin (5-7)

  9. Mike (5-7)

  10. Dave (5-7)

  11. Babel# (4-8)

  12. Pulley# (4-8)

+ Clinched first-round bye

* Clinched playoff spot

# Eliminated from playoff contention

Upcoming Week

Ed v. Babel (Battle for the Old-School Timberwolves Hat)

Rob v. Pulley (Clash of Hatred)

Allen v. Derrek (Optimus Prime v. Megatron)

Matt v. Mike (Werecat Bowl)

Rabbit v. Pat (Out-of-Towners Bowl (I got nothing, sorry guys))

Kevin v. Dave (Match for FIFA)

Closing Thoughts

It's an exciting time to be alive, as three Blingaleague members have life-changing events coming up, and we wish them well.

Babel marries the lucky Jackie at the end of January. It will be a lovely Polish celebration, of that there is no doubt.

Allen proposed to the (allegedly?) lucky Erin, and she said yes.

Pulley's MondoSperm know how to get the job done, yet again, as he and Megan have announced that they will be welcoming a brother or sister for wee Emma next summer.

Congratulations to these three, and good luck to all. Let Rivalry Week begin!

Journalistically yours,

E$