Bots vs. Humans: Can't we all just get along?

League Status

All keepers are in. Check out the draft board: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0AjjwZZ1eHJfndGVYVzk3QlNiYXNwZTNXekp2S2NtaUE#gid=0.

(Richie and Mike S - this is the actual board we'll be using during the draft. Any player listed on it now was kept. Any player not listed will be available to draft.)

The draft is August 18, two weeks from tomorrow, and it sounds like we're going to have excellent turnout (possibly eleven people in person).

* We are going to start at 2 pm sharp to work with everyone's schedule, so please be there at 1:30. *

I'll have some food out and also some beer, but feel free to bring your own.

Onto the Keepers

Nick "Rabbit" Warren: Arian Foster (3rd round) and A.J. Green (7th)

The Skinny: The richest stays rich. Arian Foster is a no-brainer top-three pick, and Rabs will retain him for a mere third-rounder. Can the Warren/Foster combo win three titles in three years?

Matt Harrison: Jimmy Graham (9th) and DeMarco Murray (12th)

The Skinny: Conservative, but risky. Maurice Jones-Drew was available to Matt for a 1st, but the reigning runner-up decided that was too risky a move, given the player's current holdout status. Instead, he went with two low-round values. He's in good shape.

Ed Gross: Ryan Mathews (3rd) and Brandon Marshall (4th)

The Skinny: Possibly two top-five players at their positions, but, as a pair, more costly than most others' keepers. Mathews and Marshall are full of potential, but yours truly will be left without picks in the rounds where steals can often be found, and championships won.

Rob Gross: Aaron Rodgers (1st) and Rob Gronkowski (6th)

The Skinny: If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Rob had a three-man team last year: Rodgers, Gronkowski, and Wes Welker. Might as well keep the band together.

Allen Clark: Drew Brees (1st) and Marshawn Lynch (12th)

The Skinny: Talent plus trouble. Brees is about as consistent as you can get in fantasy football, so he's a great value at the tenth overall pick. Lynch has ridiculous value in the 12th, but will he get suspended for a few games for his offseason DUI? Either way, this is a good pair of keepers for our anti-bot crusader.

Derrek Drenckpohl: Larry Fitzgerald (2nd) and Darren McFadden (7th)

The Skinny: As always, D has solid keepers. Fitz was a steal in the draft last year, so keeping him is a no-brainer. And McFadden is a first-round calibre player. Now, he just has to avoid third-round defenses...

Mark Babel: Calvin Johnson (1st) and Michael Vick (7th)

The Skinny: Another very solid pair. Megatron is the overwhelmingly consensus #1 WR this year, and would surely have been drafted by the time Babel picked. Michael Vick is great value midway through the draft.

Kevin Pattermann: Vernon Davis (4th) and Victor Cruz (9th)

The Skinny: Will history repeat itself? Kevin sure hopes so. Cruz was awesome last year, and is certainly worth a 9th. Davis finally broke out last year, as well. But can we really expect either player to maintain last year's high level?

Mike Romor: Fred Jackson (5th) and Jordy Nelson (9th)

The Skinny: Positional value trumps all! Mike had three options: Jackson, Nelson, and Aaron Hernandez for the low, low price of a twelfth-round pick. Hernanez had to be tempting, but Mike went with the guys who play the important positions: RB and WR.

Adam Pulley: Julio Jones (6th) and Antonio Brown (9th)

The Skinny: He's got his WR corps, now he needs the rest of a team. While there's some risk involved with keeping two WRs, these were obvious choices for the Pullman. Jones and Brown both had huge years, and look to be featured even more by their offenses.

Pat Gawne: Jay Cutler (9th) and Dustin Keller (11th)

The Skinny: Not too sexy to be kept. Neither Cutler nor Keller seems very exciting as a top-line fantasy prospect this season, but they don't have to be for the price Pat paid. Would he have been able to draft them in the ninth and eleventh rounds? Almost certainly not, and that's why they still have value.

Dave Fultz: Darren Sproles (12th) and Cam Newton (13)

The Skinny: We all know this story. Every year, it seems Dave has ridiculously good keepers. And every year, he manages to blow it. Does anyone doubt his abilities in 2012?

Mike Schertz: no keepers

The Skinny: Obviously, Mike has no keepers for his expansion season. But, he did get a break in the lottery, snagging the #2 overall pick and a guarantee to get an MVP-level player, at least.

Richie Armour: no keepers

The Skinny: Richie, on the other hand, got a wee bit screwed. Despite having the best odds (along with Schertz) of getting the #1 pick, Richie fell all the way to seventh. He'll have to do a great job identifying steals come draft day.

Keeper Breakdown

By position:

QB - 5

RB - 7

WR - 8

TE - 4

By round:

1st - 3

2nd - 1

3rd - 2

4th - 2

5th - 1

6th - 2

7th - 3

8th - 0

9th - 5

10th - 0

11th - 1

12th - 3

13th - 1

14th - 0

15th - 0

16th - 0

Draft Order

Or just go here: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/ccc?key=0AjjwZZ1eHJfndGVYVzk3QlNiYXNwZTNXekp2S2NtaUE#gid=0.

1. Pat

2. Mike Schertz

3. Kevin

4. Mike Romor

5. Dave

6. Babel

7. Richie

8. Pulley

9. Derrek

10. Allen

11. Rob

12. Ed

13. Matt

14. Rabbit

As always, this order is reversed in the even-numbered rounds.

Closing Thoughts

OK guys, here's your official Sanderson Gazette announcement: congratulations to Michael K. Schertz, who is getting married to Mel today! All the best, Mike!

In a clerical note, we now have two Mikes in the league. So far, I've been using the clunky "Mike R" and "Mike S", but I'm not sure I like this. Moving forward, they will be known as "Mike R" and "Schertz", unless any objections are raised.

Also, special nerd bonus points (Allen has tons of these) if you know what the title of this issue means.

Love, your commish,

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