The Sanderson Gazette - 2012-11-07 - Two Fultzes are Better Than One
Scroll down to read about two new Blingaleague records, some possible first-time playoff teams, and the craziest week of player movement we've ever seen...
Week Nine Recap
Rabbit def. Schertz, 132.18-103.85:
Not even Doug Martin (51.90) could snag Schertz a victory against the Blingaleague's model franchise. Rabbit's team was incredibly balanced this week: his high scorer was A.J. Green, with 19.80, and his low scorer was Alfred Morris, with 7.60. And you know what happens to you if finish last on Rabbit's team? You get traded away!
Babel def. Allen, 101.25-96.05:
This wasn't the prettiest of games (Doug Martin was outscoring each of these guys at one point), but Babel will take the win to stay in the playoff hunt. Calvin Johnson is starting to live up to his first-round cost, putting up 17.20 points. Marshawn Lynch scored 21.87 for Allen in a losing effort.
Mike R. def. Derrek, 109.17-81.69:
Mike maintains his first-place standing with this win over a quality opponent, thanks in large part to the Bears defense (27.00). Derrek got 31.67 from Adrian Peterson, but another Viking, Christian Ponder (-0.55) sealed his fate.
Dave def. Rob, 134.35-84.07:
The Fultz Brothers remain in playoff position thanks to great weeks from Cam Newton (23.75), Matt Forte (22.30), and DeSean Jackson (19.33). Rob got 25.00 from Mikel LeShoure's three-touchdown performance, but now finds himself relegated to keeper-hoarding.
Ed def. Pat, 114.71-83.66:
Neither of the RBs that moved between these two teams lived up to their potential, with Ray Rice scoring 16.60 for Ed and Ryan Mathews scoring 7.37 for Pat. Reggie Wayne did put up 16.40 for Mr. Gawne, but it wasn't enough, as Brandon Marshall put up 34.27 for yours truly.
Pulley def. Richie, 101.07-73.53:
The four starting RBs (Dexter McCluster, Justin Forsett, Donald Brown, Jacquizz Rodgers) in this matchup scored a combined 10.67 points. And that's with Rodgers accounting for 7.07 of it. Pulley won because he has more good players elsewhere on his roster, and got a huge game from Brandon Myers (19.87).
Matt def. Kevin, 124.81-70.22:
Kevin's sixth loss in seven games prompted him to look for keepers - and he got a great one in Alfred Morris. Meanwhile, Matt's team just keeps rolling right along.
Current Standings
Mike R., 8-1, 1055.20
Rabbit, 8-1, 997.65
Matt, 7-2, 1021.22
Ed, 7-2, 967.89
Derrek, 6-3, 880.97
Dave, 5-4, 860.22
Pulley, 4-5, 843.48
Babel, 4-5, 826.50
Allen, 3-6, 895.68
Kevin, 3-6, 774.63
Pat, 3-6, 743.11
Rob, 2-7, 869.41
Schertz, 2-7, 755.80
Richie, 1-8, 742.05
Playoff Scenarios
Mike R. clinches a playoff berth with:
a win or tie
OR
a loss AND a Babel loss.
Rabbit clinches a playoff berth with:
a win or tie.
Matt clinches a playoff berth with:
a win or tie AND a Pulley loss AND a Babel loss.
Ed clinches a playoff berth with:
a win or tie AND a Pulley loss AND a Babel loss.
Weekly Awards
Team Blangums: The Fultzes earn this one over Rabs, with a solid 134.35.
Slapped Heartbeat: Kevin's sixth loss in seven weeks takes this one, as he put up only 70.22.
MVP of the Week: Doug Martin gets this for the second straight week, as his 51.90 points are a new Blingaleague record, edging out Michael Vick's 51.65 in week ten of 2010.
Dud of the Week: Christian Ponder's -0.55 must be causing D to have Steelers defense flashbacks.
Week Ten Preview
Game of the Blingaweek
Half of a Horse (Ed, 7-2, 4th) vs. Harrison Hammers (Matt, 7-2, 3rd):
Matt leads all-time series, 4-2.
At this time last year, the top two teams were both 6-3. This year, our two 7-2 teams aren't even in line to get byes!
This should be a fun one, folks. Both Matt and I have done quite a bit to shore up our teams recently, but in different ways. I traded two players for one big-ticket RB, Ray Rice. Matt spun a back with tons of keeper value to give himself a bit more depth.
Oh, and we'll be watching our matchups unfold from the comfort of a sports book in Vegas. Can life get any better?
Anyway, I have a theme for this week in mind, so...
What's at stake for Ed? A first-round bye. It would be awfully tough to finish in the top two with a loss this week, even with a game against Mike R. on the horizon as a spot to make up ground.
What's at stake for Matt? Um, the same thing? Matt has slightly more leeway, since he's ahead in points, but the same exact reasoning does apply. He even has yet to face Mike.
Pick: Half of a Horse.
Other Blingamatches
Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 4-5, 7th) vs. DumbFace 4 President (Dave, 5-4, 6th):
Dave leads all-time series, 3-2.
What's at stake for Dave? Increased odds of making the playoffs for the first time ever. While losing wouldn't be too critical, as he's still have three weeks overtake Mr. Pulley, winning would be quite big, and winning plus a Babel loss would be huge, putting Dave up two games with three to play. And you can tell the Fultzes want this badly, as they just sent some players with some nice keeper prospects to Rob for Frank Gore and some other usable parts.
What's at stake for Pulley? His playoff chances. A win would almost certainly put Pulley into the sixth spot for now, though by the total points tiebreaker. A loss would put him two games behind Dave with three to play. And the downgrade from Aaron Rodgers to Blaine Gabbert can't give him much confidence.
Pick: DumbFace 4 President.
Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 8-1, 2nd) vs. Artifish Inteligents (Babel, 4-5, 8th):
Rabbit leads all-time series, 3-1.
What's at stake for Rabs? Immediately, a clinched playoff berth. But in the long run, not too much. His point total isn't spectacular (compared to Mike R. and Matt), so a loss could drop him out of a bye for now. But he'd have plenty of time to make that up.
What's at stake for Babel? Pretty much basically, a playoff spot. Babel's point total lags behind the others in his weight class, so a loss here might mean he has to run the table the rest of the way. He gets a break with Rabs having to start Mark Ingram, but will that be enough?
Pick: Pralines & Dick.
Location Nouns (Rob, 2-7, 12th) vs. Bernard's Bullies (Mike R., 8-1, 1st):
Rob leads all-time series, 4-0.
What's at stake for Rob? An undefeated record in this series. And possibly the sadness of falling behind Schertz in the standings. But nothing else.
What's at stake for Mike R.? Almost nothing. Bernie's well on his way to his first playoff berth ever, and can even clinch this week if Rabbit dispatches Babel. I doubt he'll need it, though, with Matt Ryan getting to face the Saints.
Pick: Bernard's Bullies.
DICK ARMOUR (Richie, 1-8, 14th) vs. D's Nuts (Derrek, 6-3, 5th):
All-time series tied, 0-0.
What's at stake for Richie? Trade bait, or something. Richie's still looking for one more keeper, so his best hope is for one of his non-DeMarco-Murray players to put up a huge day and cause someone else to give up something good in exchange.
What's at stake for Derrek? Peace of mind. A win this week would all but clinch a playoff spot for D, as he'd be at least two games up with three to play. A loss, though, brings him closer to the pack. And he doesn't want to re-live 2008's end-season collapse again.
Pick: D's Nuts.
The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 3-6, 10th) vs. Our Doug is a white (Pat, 3-6, 11th):
Pat leads all-time series, 3-0.
What's at stake for Kevin? His last remaining playoff hopes, and dignity. A loss, plus a Dave win, would eliminate Kevin officially, so a win here is quite necessary.
What's at stake for Pat? See "Kevin, What's at stake for?"
Pick: Our Doug is a white.
Optimus Prime (Allen, 3-6, 9th) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 2-7, 13th):
All-time series tied, 0-0.
What's at stake for Allen? Playoff hopes. Like Kevin and Pat, a loss, plus a win by Dave, eliminates Dr. Clark. But, if he does win, his hopes are a little higher. He's currently fifth overall in points, so if he runs the table, he's got a very reasonable shot at sneaking into the playoffs.
What's at stake for Schertz? Nothing. He's got his keepers set (Doug Martin and Robert Griffin III). All he can do is play spoiler from here on out.
Pick: schertzopotamus.
Sunday Huddle
No Sunday Huddle at my place, unless you consider the South Point casino to be part of my real estate holdings. And don't expect to hang out with Matt or Richie, either, for the same reason.
Closing Thoughts
The trade deadline is November 16. And we've already had seven trades this year, which is another Blingaleague record. Keep it up, guys, it's been awesome.
Eddo