The Sanderson Gazette - 2013-09-25 - Mea Culpa

Let's just say my predictions haven't been so great through week three.

Week Three Recap

Pulley def. Schertz, 106.93-90.27:

Our Game of the Blingaweek mostly lived up to its billing, though it wasn't the tightest match of the week, or the highest-scoring. Pulley was led by big games from his RBs, LeSean McCoy (21.80) and Joique Bell (21.50), overcoming a zero from Jermichael Finley. Schertz got a zero of his own in Hakeem Nicks.

Matt def. Allen, 145.44-96.19:

Matt gets his second-straight $10 payout thanks to one of the more balanced games you can imagine. Only his kicker (Dan Bailey, 6.00) had less than ten points. Allen was led by the Bears defense, which scored 24.00 points on Sunday night.

Pat def. Babel, 77.19-76.61:

The sixth-closest Blingaleague game of all time was devastating for Babel, as he needed only 4.00 points from Sebastian Janikowski on Monday night. His fellow Pole fell one point short. Pat overcame a zero from Eddie Lacy (and he even picked up James Starks on waivers), thanks to Drew Brees's 31.20.

Dave def. Ed, 141.62-105.11:

The Fultz brothers put together an outstanding week, only to just fall short of Team Blangums. Cam Newton (30.65) and Josh Gordon (27.67) were the high scorers. I got a three-touchdown game from Jordan Cameron (26.80) in a losing effort.

Derrek def. Rabbit, 95.46-65.88:

Derrek had an uneven roster. Eric Decker (23.73) and Sidney Rice (22.53) were very good, but Colin Kaepernick (2.50) and Vincent Brown (1.47) were very bad. However, Rabs had only one good game - Matthew Stafford's 24.45 - and had two players earn -1.00 (Josh Brown and the Rams defense).

Rob def. Kevin, 108.15-46.34:

Antonio Brown (38.13) led the way for Rob. Oh, he was helped out by this Peyton Manning guy (27.50), too. Kevin had three players with less than one point: Dwyane Bowe (0.53), Daryl Richardson (0.00), and the Steelers defense (0.00), and remains winless.

Richie def. Mike R., 81.82-56.12:

It wasn't pretty, but I'm sure Richie will take this week, which doubles his 2012 output. DeMarco Murray finally did something worthwhile, scoring 27.23 points. If only he could play the Rams every week. Mike's leading scorer was Justin Tucker (14.00). Yes, that's a kicker.

Current Standings

  1. Pulley, 3-0, 385.18

  2. Matt, 2-1, 402.36

  3. Schertz, 2-1, 327.74

  4. Ed, 2-1, 320.02

  5. Allen, 2-1, 303.84

  6. Derrek, 2-1, 294.98

  7. Pat, 2-1, 260.09

  8. Richie, 2-1, 252.68

  9. Dave, 1-2, 309.64

  10. Mike R., 1-2, 296.71

  11. Rabbit, 1-2, 294.63

  12. Rob, 1-2, 286.01

  13. Kevin, 0-3, 316.68

  14. Babel, 0-3, 256.09

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums: Matt, 145.44.

Slapped Heartbeat: Kevin's 46.34 is the twelfth-worst score ever.

Weekly MVP: Antonio Brown's 38.13 sets a really high bar for WR scores.

Weekly Dud: Eli Manning's -1.65 almost seems fake.

Start of the Week: Pulley sat Rashard Mendenhall (4.50) in favor of Joique Bell (21.50). That was a good move.

Misplay of the Week: Babel gets this, one way or another. He played Andy Dalton's 12.05 instead of Ben Roethlisberger's 18.00. He also could have played Antonio Gates (13.33) at TE over Tony Gonzalez (3.20), or he could have played Gates or Daniel Thomas (10.23) at flex and kept Tavon Austin (4.30) on his bench.

Week Four Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Half of a Horse (Ed, 2-1, 4th) vs. Optimus Prime (Allen, 2-1, 5th):

Ed leads all-time series, 5-1.

Did anyone think these teams would have two wins combined after three weeks, let alone two wins each?

My two wins are thanks to my WRs (Larry Fitzgerald, @TB, and Brandon Marshall, @DET) and my TE (Jordan Cameron, vs. CIN). And thanks to a shrewd trade to bring over two now-starting-calibre RBs (Knowshon Moreno, vs. PHI, and Fred Jackson, vs. BAL).

Allen's two wins are due to Aaron Rodgers (BYE) and the Bears defense (@DET) still being the best around.

This week, Allen's star, Rodgers, is on bye, but he's got Philip Rivers (vs. DAL) to fill in. My team's at full strength. That might make up the difference in this game.

Pick: Half of a Horse.

Other Blingamatches

Vinegar Strokes (Pat, 2-1, 7th) vs. Harrison Hammers (Matt, 2-1, 2nd):

Pat leads all-time series, 3-2.

Pat's got some tough matchups this week, as Drew Brees faces the so-far-tough Dolphins pass defense, Arian Foster plays against the Seahawks, and James Jones is on bye. Matt's QB, RGIII, gets to play against the Raiders.

Pick: Harrison Hammers.

Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 3-0, 1st) vs. DICK ARMOUR (Richie, 2-1, 8th):

Pulley leads all-time series, 1-0.

These two enter week four on a combined five-game winning streak. And this looks to be a pretty even matchup. An extremely simple breakdown? Richie wins if the Colts decide to beat Jacksonville by running (Trent Richardson); Pulley wins if they use the passing game (Andrew Luck).

Pick: Pullman's MondoSquad.

Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 1-2, 11th) vs. THRILLHO (Rob, 1-2, 12th):

Rabbit leads all-time series, 4-3.

It's weird to see Rabs sitting at 1-2, coming off a mid-60s week, looking up at Pat, Richie, and Dave in the standings. This week looks promising for him, as A.J. Green could potentially torch the Cleveland secondary. But Rob's got a WR going up against an equally crapping pass defense in Antonio Brown (@MIN). Rob's also got Peyton Manning (vs. PHI).

Pick: THRILLHO.

San Jose Sharknados (Mike R., 1-2, 10th) vs. D's Nuts (Derrek, 2-1, 6th):

Derrek leads all-time series, 4-3.

This one features two QBs that could use big rebound games. Mike's got Eli Manning, at the Chiefs good defense. D's got Colin Kaepernick, at St. Louis on Thursday night. Do I have to choose one of these guys to win?

Pick: D's Nuts.

Coach Bombay's DD (Dave, 1-2, 9th) vs. Limited Characters (Babel, 0-3, 14th):

Babel leads all-time series, 5-0.

Dave's never won against Mark, and this week doesn't look great, as Cam Newton's on bye. Babel could use a win, or else he might have to start looking for keepers.

Pick: Limited Characters.

The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 0-3, 13th) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 2-1, 3rd):

Kevin leads all-time series, 1-0.

Yahoo thinks Dwayne Bowe (vs. NYG) is good for almost ten points. His actual play this year says otherwise. Not good news for Kevin.

Pick: schertzopotamus.

League Dues

Yet another reminder - for those of you who haven't paid me, please send $40 to 3514 N. Leavitt, Chicago, IL 60618 as soon as you can.

(Thank you to Allen this week.)

Closing Thoughts

Also, I'm very sorry to those of you I picked this week, as apparently I have the kiss of death this year.

Eddo