The Sanderson Gazette - 2014-12-10 - Strokin' It

One of these things is not like the others...

Quarterfinals Recap

Babel def. Dave, 150.61-149.69:

This was the second-highest-scoring losing effort in Blingaleague history (Kevin lost to Matt, 171.54-151.29, in week two of 2013). Mark got 43.17 from Le'Veon Bell and had only one player (Antonio Gates, 4.53) score less than eight points. Dave had three thirty-point scorers (A.J. Green (35.87), Jordy Nelson (31.47), and Aaron Rodgers (30.15) in his losing effort. To re-iterate just how insane this game was, Dave scored 61.62 points on Monday night, and put up the 25th-highest score ever!

Matt def. Rob, 144.14-65.55:

Despite scoring enough points to win over 97% of the time, Matt has to be thankful that our last-place team defeated Dave during rivarly week. Otherwise, Matt would have taken the extremely tough loss to #3 seed Dave. As it is, Matt got 40.53 from Julio Jones and 23.77 from Jamaal Charles, along with a surprising 22.83 from Percy Harvin. Rob got only 4.45 from Peyton Manning.

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums: Babel's 150.61 is the 24rd-highest score of all time.

Slapped Heartbeat: Rob's 65.55 is the second-lowest playoff score ever (Babel scored 56.73 in the 2008 third-place game).

Weekly MVP: Le'Veon Bell's 43.17 was the top contributor to Babel's big week.

Misplay of the Week: Denard Robinson (3.00) might be the misplay of all time! Dave could have played Sammy Watkins (14.93) instead. Does this count as Sammy's revenge? (NOTE: those of you who don't participate in the Blingachat won't get this reference.)

Season Postmortems

Dave (and Kyle) Fultz (BANGARANG RUFIO, 7-7, 5th/6th (final record and place pending)):

Not gonna rub any more salt in this wound... but, some facts: the Fultzes have made the playoffs two years in a row, and they only failed to score 100 points three times this year (and only failed to score 95 once).

Expected wins (regular season): 8.525.

Rob Gross (THRILLO, 8-6, 5th/6th (final record and place pending)):

That Clash of Hatred loss looms large. I feel like this was a fairly typical Rob season: ups, downs, playoffs, a top-heavy team...

Expected wins (regular season): 7.415.

Semifinals Preview

#1 Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 10-3) vs. #6 Harrison Hammers (Matt, 8-6):

Rabbit leads all-time series, 7-3.

Rabs quietly won the regular-season title, returning to the playoffs after a one-year hiatus. His team isn't flashy, but he just kept winning.

Matt, on the other hand, had to qualify on the last week of the season, keeping his three-peat hopes alive.

These two have won five Sanderson Cups between them (going 1-1 against each other in Blingabowls II and IV). Their eleventh matchup could come down to Drew Brees (@CHI) for Matt on Monday night.

Pick: Harrison Hammers.

#2 Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 9-4) vs. #5 Keep Calm and Le'Veon (Babel, 8-6):

All-time series tied, 5-5.

X marks the spot for this one.

Babel has two modes: "late-season collapse" and "late-season run". Unfortunately for me and Dave, the latter is what's in style in 2014.

Aside from a three-game losing streak after midseason, Pulley's been the class of the Blingaleague this year. But will that be enough?

Whose Steeler will have the bigger game against the awful Atlanta defense - Pulley's Antonio Brown or Babel's Le'Veon Bell? It seems silly not to keep calm and go with Le'Veon.

Pick: Keep Calm and Le'Veon.

Closing Thoughts

After Monday night's stroke-inducing game, I've got nothing.

Also, the fifth-place game doesn't get a preview.

Eddo