The Sanderson Gazette - 2017-10-25 - Moving Forward

A new high-scoring week for 2017... plus a brand new award!

Week Seven Recap

https://blingaleague.com/week/2017/7/

Mike R. def Pat, 94.79-93.31:

It will go down as the #bigtimeterrelle game, as Terrelle Pryor's 1.87 points were the difference in this one. Pat got 13.27 of his own from Chris Thompson on Monday night, but it wasn't enough to catch up to Bernie and the 34.35 provided by Derek Carr to start the week.

Allen def. Rabbit, 100.50-97.29:

Allen scored a big upset thanks to Ezekiel Elliott's 42.30-point outburst. Rabs got 24.95 from Kirk Cousins, but too many of those were on passes to Allen's Jordan Reed (20.53).

Kevin def. Derrek, 118.33-81.05:

D laid a big egg in a big game, with Le'Veon Bell (21.13) getting over a quarter of his points. Kevin got 40.00 from Amari Cooper (finally!), which made up from 5.47 from each of Keenan Allen and Adam Thielen.

Babel def. Dave, 130.03-96.80:

Babel put up an evenly-distributed 130-point game, with every player between 4.60 (Melvin Gordon) and 26.70 (Jameis Winston). Dave got 32.20 from Carson Wentz, which at least got him to a respectable point total.

Richie def. Pulley, 119.31-95.29:

Richie got huge games from Dak Prescott (32.30) and the Chargers defense (30.00) to pull a major upset. Pulley got the usual 23.00 from Todd Gurley, but Martavis Bryant (0.60) and Rob Gronkowski (6.80) both disappointed.

Rob def. Schertz, 113.75-87.90:

Drew Brees (21.95) had a strong second half to lead Rob to victory and Zach Ertz (17.87) also finished strong. Aaron Jones (20.03) was a good find for Schertz, but he couldn't get back above .500 on the year.

Ed def. Matt, 85.16-65.24:

Whatever.

Current Standings

https://blingaleague.com/standings/

  1. Dave, 5-2, 740.88

  2. Pulley, 5-2, 735.05

  3. Rob, 5-2, 716.01

  4. Kevin, 5-2, 647.86

  5. Babel, 4-3, 808.73

  6. Derrek, 4-3, 709.09

  7. Schertz, 3-4, 655.30

  8. Richie, 3-4, 626.71

  9. Rabbit, 3-4, 615.62

  10. Matt, 3-4, 599.18

  11. Mike R., 3-4, 574.74

  12. Allen, 3-4, 563.16

  13. Ed, 2-5, 622.22

  14. Pat, 1-6, 583.87

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums: Babel snagged his second Team Blangums of the season with 130.03.

Slapped Heartbeat: Matt returned to his sub-80-point ways with 65.24 and one seriously Slapped Heartbeat.

Weekly MVP: Ezekiel Elliott's 42.30 was enormous for Dr. Clark.

Dud of the Week: Marshawn Lynch's ejection and 0.90 were a huge reason for Matt's overall dud of a week.

Start of the Week: Allen played Jordan Reed's 20.53 over Jason Witten's 13.20 and won by 3.21.

Misplay of the Week: Playing Robert Woods (8.27) over Donte Moncrief (4.00) would have resulted in victory for Rabbit.

NEW AWARD - Pryor Player of the Week!

This award will go to the player that has been disappointing all year but finally breaks through to give his owner a win. Our first recipient of this award will be... Amari Cooper, whose 40.00 was head and shoulders his highest score of the season for Kevin.

Week Eight Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Pullman's (Pulley, 5-2, 2nd) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 3-4, 7th):

Pulley leads all-time series, 6-1 (link).

Which of the Chargers and Lions actually have a good defense? Both have looked great at various times this year, and the former faces off against Pulley's top two players (Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski) while the latter will be trying to stop Schertz's (Ben Roethlisberger and Antonio Brown).

Pulley looks to have a playoff berth locked up, as 88% of previous 5-2 teams have made the playoffs (link). Schertz, on the other hand, is fighting for his life; if he falls to 3-5, he'd be part of a group with barely a 25% playoff rate.

I see Pulley making the playoffs and Schertz just missing them, but not because of this week's outcome.

Pick: schertzopotamus.

Other Blingamatches

Rob for Today (Rob, 5-2, 3rd) vs. Palmer is ALL Right (Richie, 3-4, 8th):

Richie leads all-time series, 4-2 (link).

Richie is trying to follow the patented Babel Path to the playoffs, following up a legitimately poor start with a run starting midseason. Dak Prescott (@WAS) has been a great keeper for Richie, and if the Falcons can find a way to get Julio Jones (@NYJ) more involved, watch out. Rob should cruise to the playoffs based on his record (see above), though he could stand to shore up his RBs; Christian McCaffrey (@TAM) and James White (vs. LAC) are a tad underwhelming for a true contender.

I see Rob challenging for the second bye and Richie playing Schertz with a shot at the playoffs come week thirteen.

Pick: Rob for Today.

Chili Right Away (Dave, 5-2, 1st) vs. Optimus Prime (Allen, 3-4, 12th):

Allen leads all-time series, 8-2 (link).

Dave's still in first place, and his trades for Alshon Jeffery (vs. SF) and Chris Thompson (vs. DAL) should mitigate some of the bad injury luck he's suffered. Allen is always dangerous with Ezekiel Elliott (@WAS) starting, but he really doesn't have enough depth to be a serious contender.

I see Dave snagging a bye and Allen being eliminated in week 12.

Pick: Chili Right Away.

Keep Calm & GordOn (Babel, 4-3, 5th) vs. Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 3-4, 9th):

Rabbit leads all-time series, 6-5 (link).

Babel's been unlucky; he leads the league in points and expected wins, but sits at a mere 4-3. At the same time, Rabs is worse than his record; while three wins is about right (32% likelihood), he also has had a 45% of fewer wins than that. Both these guys have QBs that put up better fantasy numbers than real ones; Jameis Winston (vs. CAR) goes for Babel and Kirk Cousins (vs. DAL) goes for Rabs.

I see Babel's bad luck continuing and him needing to beat me in Rivalry Week to earn a playoff berth, while Rabs hovers around .500 but would effectively be eliminated by tiebreakers prior to week thirteen.

Pick: Pralines & Dick.

Harrison Hammers (Matt, 3-4, 10th) vs. D's Nuts (Derrek, 4-3, 6th):

Matt leads all-time series, 6-5 (link).

D has a strong team but laid an egg last week. Le'Veon Bell (@DET) gives him a chance to win every week. Matt laid an even bigger egg and could be without his top RB (Marshawn Lynch, suspended) and TE (Evan Engram, bye).

I see Matt fading into Bolivian and Derrek making the playoffs.

Pick: D's Nuts.

The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 5-2, 4th) vs. Noodles and Vistas (Pat, 1-6, 14th):

Pat leads all-time series, 6-2 (link).

Kevin's outpacing his expected wins (only a 13% chance of five or more), but he's definitely in contention if Amari Cooper (@BUF) is going to finally produce like a second-round pick. Pat's scrappy without Aaron Rodgers, but he would need to win out to make the playoffs.

I see Kevin clinching in week twelve and Pat finishing in last again.

Pick: The Chocolate Donuts.

Live Commish (Ed, 2-5, 13th) vs. Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 3-4, 11th):

All-time series tied, 5-5 (link).

Two disappointing teams. Bernie's because of injuries (what else is new?) and yours truly's due to some bad luck combined with lackluster performances. I'm already set with keepers, while Mike has some decisions to make.

I see myself stupidly finishing hot to keep Babel out of the playoffs and Mike getting another pointless Rivaly Week win against Matt.

Pick: Bernie's Bullies.

Closing Thoughts

We're going into the home stretch, and even though I'm out of it, I'm still excited. Hope you all are, too.

LiveCommish