Collectively, we averaged 97.95 points this week (link), which means 2017 joins 2008 as the only seasons in which we didn't crack 100 in the first eleven weeks. Week twelve was 2008's only 100-point week... could history repeat itself in Blingaleague Year X?

Week Eleven Recap

https://blingaleague.com/week/2017/11/

Rob def. Babel, 141.39-123.11:

The Dickran Duel lived up to its hype this year, with two of the three highest scoring teams of week eleven involved. Rob got 25.87 from Brandin Cooks and a surprising 21.07 from Rishard Matthews, offsetting the 30.45 and 25.00 Babel got from Ben Roethlisberger and the Jacksonville defense, respectively. Redboner of the Year: Zach Ertz (1.07) for Rob.

Schertz def. Rabbit, 123.67-111.33:

Schertz kept the playoff picture interesting by handing Rabbit his own tough loss. Russell Wilson and his 32.00 outdueled Kirk Cousins (Nathan Peterman?) and his 28.20 in this one, but the real hero was the Baltimore defense, which scored 29.00 despite not scoring a defensive touchdown.

Kevin def. Allen, 103.11-85.77:

Allen led this for a while, but Kevin got enough from Derek Carr (15.35), Amari Cooper (9.73), and Jay Ajayi (10.43) in the afternoon and night games to pass Allen and clinch a playoff spot. Doctor Touchdown did get a pair of TDs from Latavius Murray (21.63), but could not pull off the major upset.

Dave def. Matt, 119.39-72.46:

Dave's deep team, led by Antonio Brown's 37.20, sustained two more serious injuries, this time to Chris Thompson (9.83) and Kelvin Benjamin (2.67 on the bench). He had easily enough power to defeat Matt's sputtering team, who suffered a six-point swing when Blair Walsh (11.00) came up hilariously short on a 52-yard attempt to tie Monday night's game.

Pulley def. Mike R., 110.27-69.06:

Pulley clinched a playoff spot and made Bernie the only eliminated team with this dominating win.

Derrek def. Richie, 82.83-61.95:

D will take this fortunate win to move him ever-closer to a playoff berth. Nathan Peterman's (Kirk Cousins's?) five-pick afternoon resulted in Richie getting 24.00 from the Chargers defense, but -1.75 from Dak Prescott sealed his fate. Derrek was led by Davante Adams's 16.80.

Pat def. Ed, 101.05-66.02:

Pat won handily despite Jay Cutler (2.25) missing a half of football thanks mainly to Kenny Stills's crazy 30.00-point game. My strong midseason acquisitions all turned to pumpkins at once, as Jared Goff (11.05), JuJu Smith-Schuster (6.27), and Jerick McKinnon (6.40) all had sub-standard games.

Current Standings

https://blingaleague.com/standings/

1. x-Pulley, 9-2, 1164.64

2. x-Dave, 8-3, 1194.17

3. x-Kevin, 8-3, 1089.52

4. Rob, 7-4, 1115.20

5. Derrek, 7-4, 1086.90

6. Rabbit, 6-5, 1006.32

7. Babel, 5-6, 1125.35

8. Ed, 4-7, 1044.26

9. Schertz, 4-7, 1016.20

10. Pat, 4-7, 997.08

11. Allen, 4-7, 945.19

12. Matt, 4-7, 928.98

13. Richie, 4-7, 925.53

14. e-Mike R., 3-8, 889.62

x - clinched playoff berth

e - eliminated from playoff contention

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums: Rob became our eighth different Blangums winner of the season with a strong 141.39.

Slapped Heartbeat: Richie's mercurial team scored 61.95 and found themselves with their heartbeat slapped for the third time this year.

Weekly MVP: Antonio Brown's 37.20-point output is exactly why Dave gave up one of the top keepers in the league for him.

Dud of the Week: Dak Prescott had been having a great fantasy season, but his -1.75 this week was simply terrible.

Start of the Week: No real award here, but I'd like to point out that Schertz played literally his only possible lineup - all his bench guys were hurt or on bye - and broke 120 points.

Misplay of the Week: Marvin Jones, Jr. (17.33) and Duke Johnson, Jr. (14.47) both outscored DeVante Parker (3.47) by twelve or more points; had Rabbit played either, he'd have gotten the all-important seventh win.

Playoff Scenarios

Pulley has clinched a playoff berth.

Pulley clinches a bye with:

• a win

OR

• a Dave loss AND a Kevin loss.

Dave has clinched a playoff berth.

Kevin has clinched a playoff berth.

Rob clinches a playoff berth with:

• a win

OR

• a Babel loss.

Derrek clinches a playoff berth with:

• a win

OR

• a Babel loss.

Rabbit clinches a playoff berth with:

• a win AND a Babel loss

OR

• a Babel loss AND an Ed loss

(Mike R. has been eliminated from playoff contention.)

Playoff Scenarios, Part II

BlingaWoj touches on this in his Gazette Review this week (link), but I'll lay it out more explicitly here.

Pulley has clinched. He's in really good shape for a bye; if he wins either of his remaining games, he'll get one. Dave and Kevin are both one game behind him, but because they play each other in week thirteen, only one can actually pass Pulley in wins, so Pulley should really root for Kevin specifically to lose this week, as he will almost certainly maintain his tiebreaker point advantage over our defending champ.

One of Dave or Kevin will get to nine wins for sure, so one of them should get a bye. Dave's league-leading point total leaves him in the position where a win plus a Kevin loss this week essentially clinches a bye for him, even if he loses to the latter in their rivalry game.

Both Rob and Derrek can only be caught by Babel among current non-playoff teams, so one of them will for sure make the playoffs. They are close enough in poinsts (within 29 of each other) to where neither can feel confident in finishing ahead of the other, so both will need either a win or Babel loss at some point to really cement their positions.

Because of Rabbit's low point total (9th overall), he needs two positive events. If he wins twice, he's in no matter what. If he wins once, he'll need at least one Babel loss. If he loses twice, things get more interesting (see the next few paragraphs).

Babel's third overall in points, but doesn't quite control his own destiny. He's got a 119-point cushion on Rabbit, so he can basically make the playoffs if he wins one more game than Rabs from here on out (though there's an outside chance Ed can pass him in such a scenario - see below). He can also pass Rob or Derrek if he wins out and either loses out, and he currently has more points than they do.

Ed has a very outside chance - at the bare minimum, he needs to win out and needs Rabbit to lose out. Because winning out means beating Babel, he doesn't need Babel to lose this week, but if Babel wins, Ed would need to make up 82 points on his rival over the next two weeks. (This also doesn't account for Schertz, Pat, Allen, Matt, or Richie winning out and passing Ed.)

Schertz, Pat, Allen, Matt, and Richi are still alive, but need to win out, Rabbit to lose out, and Babel to take at least one loss. If any combination of teams wind up tied at 6 wins, the current tiebreakers are, relative to Babel: Ed -82; Schertz -110; Rabbit -120; Pat -129; Allen -181; Matt -197; Richie -100.

So we can have all six spots clinched this week if Rabbit wins and Babel loses, but based on my predictions below, I think there will be meaningful games next week.

Week Twelve Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Keep Calm & GordOn (Babel, 5-6, 7th) vs. The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 8-3, 3rd):

Kevin leads all-time series, 5-4 (link).

Babel still plays: Ed.

Kevin still plays: Dave.

Both these teams have clear desires for the next two weeks: for Babel, make the playoffs; for Kevin, get a bye. There's a very real chance one of those desires will be eliminated this week (but not both, as either team winning keeps one alive for sure).

Babel has some good matchups this week. Ben Roethlisberger could get some short fields vs. GB. Tyreek Hill and Kareem Hunt are vs. a BUF team that cannot stop anyone lately. Melvin Gordon is @DAL on Thanksgiving. The Jaguars defense will be @ARI, where Blaine Gabbert plays QB.

Kevin has a pretty deep team, but he has to make the correct WR choices. DeAndre Hopkins has been a no-brainer all year, but visits a very tough BAL defense. Amari Cooper (vs. DEN) has been occasionally hot, but mostly cold. Keenan Allen (@DAL) had a big week eleven, but was mediocre prior to that. At least A.J. Green's team hosts the Browns.

Pick: Keep Calm & GordOn.

Other Blingamatches

D's Nuts (Derrek, 7-4, 5th) vs. Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 6-5, 6th):

Rabbit leads all-time series, 8-3 (link).

Derrek still plays: Allen.

Rabbit still plays: Pat.

Derrek's been up and down all year. Through the first ten weeks, he won every time he broke 100 (six times) and lost every time he failed to crack 90 (four times); notice that he never scored between 90 and 100 points (link). In week eleven, he failed to break 90 but won, all but clinching a playoff berth.

Rabs has had a really odd season (link). Week eleven was his highest score - and he lost. He's only cracked 100 three times, but has managed four wins in sub-100 games. He has cracked 90 points four of the last five weeks, though, so he is getting relatively hot at the right time.

Le'Veon Bell (vs. GB), Matt Ryan (vs. TAM), and the Eagles defense (vs. CHI) all have good matchups for Derrek - which is a good sign for those of us who need Rabs to lose.

Pick: D's Nuts.

Live Commish (Ed, 4-7, 8th) vs. Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 9-2, 1st):

Ed leads all-time series, 5-4 (link).

Ed still plays: Babel.

Pulley still plays: Rob.

Last year, I beat Pulley in week twelve to keep my playoff hopes alive. Will this year be the same? Tom Brady and Rob Gronkowski host Miami, which is good for Pulley. Larry Fitzgerald hosts Jacksonville, and Todd Gurley hosts New Orleans, which are less good.

I have some good matchups, particularly T.Y. Hilton vs. TEN and Delanie Walker @IND, but overall I'm just not quite as good as the Pullman.

Pick: Pullman's MondoSquad.

Chili Right Away (Dave, 8-3, 2nd) vs. Palmer is ALL Right (Richie, 4-7, 13th):

Dave leads all-time series, 4-1 (link).

Dave still plays: Kevin.

Richie still plays: Schertz.

Second-to-first vs. second-to-last!

Pick: Chili Right Away.

Rob for Today (Rob, 7-4, 4th) vs. Optimus Prime (Allen, 4-7, 11th):

All-time series tied, 5-5 (link).

Rob still plays: Pulley.

Allen still plays: Derrek.

Ah, the rubber match for this series finale. I like it.

Rob can still miss the playoffs, so getting a win here - and avoiding a do-or-die matchup against Pulley - is critical. Allen just wants to play spoiler.

Pick: Rob for Today.

Harrison Hammers (Matt, 4-7, 12th) vs. Noodles and Vistas (Pat, 4-7, 10th):

Matt leads all-time series, 6-3 (link).

Matt still plays: Mike R.

Pat still plays: Rabbit.

Fun fact: this series was once 3-1 in Pat's favor.

Pick: Harrison Hammers.

Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 3-8, 14th) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 4-7, 9th):

Mike R. leads all-time series, 3-2 (link).

Mike R. still plays: Matt.

Schertz still plays: Richie.

#MIKEBOWLVI.

Pick: schertzopotamus.

Closing Thoughts

Hope you all enjoy the early edition of the Gazette! Happy Thanksgiving!

LiveCommish

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