The Sanderson Gazette - 2021-09-22 - Blown Away

Week 2 Recap

Rabbit def. Kevin, 167.50-77.65

Rabbit followed up his excellent week 1 score with an even better week 2, shattering the Blingaleague record for most points through two weeks. Once again, Kyler Murray (35.60), Cooper Kupp (33.23), Tyler Lockett (29.73), and Christian McCaffrey (21.87) led the way for Rabs. Kevin, on the other hand, saw a high score of just 17.95 (Josh Allen), and thus fell far short of his opponent.

Matt def. Pulley, 114.85-106.49

The 2019 NFL MVP, Lamar Jackson (34.15), outdueled the 2020 NFL MVP, Aaron Rodgers (27.85), leading to a victory for the Harrison Hammers. Mike Williams (18.13) and new addition Brandin Cooks (16.40) provided strong WR games for Matt, while Pulley got 21.20 from Courtland Sutton and 18.00 from the Tampa Bay defense.

Ed def. Rob, 92.03-75.92

This one was tight going into Monday night, when - Ed's pessimism be damned - Aaron Jones put up 37.10 to push the commissioner to victory. Jones's huge game allowed Ed to overcome duds from A.J. Brown (5.73), DeVonta Smith (2.13), and Tyler Higbee (1.07). Rob had some big disappointments of his own; Dak Prescott (8.85), Nelson Agholor (2.80), and Jarvis Landry (1.20) all underperformed and sealed the younger Gross's fate.

Schertz def. Richie, 140.53-81.70

Derrick Henry (43.53) had a monster week, but he wasn't the only one on Schertz's roster to outscore Richie's top player (Austin Ekeler, 15.53); Tom Brady (30.90), Mike Evans (22.00), and Julio Jones (17.07) all played like it was 2016 again.

Derrek def. Mike R., 120.93-94.29

Derrek had his second straight workmanlike victory, with Patrick Mahomes II (27.45) and Henry Ruggs III (21.27) as his top scorers. Mike R. got big games from the Buffalo defense (25.00) and Travis Kelce (20.53), but never really stood a chance in this one.

Babel def. Scott, 104.67-85.42

Babel earned a victory without a twenty-point scorer, as every player in his lineup scored between 5.00 (Harrison Butker) and 19.50 (Matthew Stafford). Scott did get 25.25 from Russell Wilson, but got 1.67 combined from Jalen Reagor (0.67), Aldrick Rosas (1.00), and the Arizona defense (zero).

Dave def. Pat, 103.20-70.04

Kirk Cousins (27.20) paced Dave's team in this matchup, with the New England defense (19.00) and Greg Zuerlein (10.00) adding nice special teams scores. Pat got 15.17 from Darrell Henderson, Jr., but it came along with an injury that could force him to miss time.

Trades

Trade between Ed and Matt

Ed received:

  • DeAndre Hopkins - from Matt - keeper cost: 2nd
  • Michael Pittman, Jr. - from Matt - keeper cost: 7th
  • Leonard Fournette - from Matt - keeper cost: 8th

Matt received:

  • Robert Woods - from Ed - keeper cost: 2nd
  • Josh Jacobs - from Ed - keeper cost: 3rd
  • Brandin Cooks - from Ed - keeper cost: 5th

Matt had some questionable flex depth before the season started, so losing Michael Gallup in week 1 meant he needed to make a move. Ed, meanwhile, had lots of depth and wanted a star player. Hence, this deal: the latter getting an elite WR (Hopkins) and the former getting three startable players.

Despite Jacobs being ruled out this week, Matt has won this trade so far, as Cooks and Woods provided more value in his lineup than Hopkins did in Ed's.

Standings

  1. Rabbit, 2-0, 315.79
  2. Babel, 2-0, 260.12
  3. Dave, 2-0, 231.02
  4. Derrek, 2-0, 230.20
  5. Schertz, 1-1, 226.75
  6. Ed, 1-1, 201.63
  7. Matt, 1-1, 196.81
  8. Pat, 1-1, 181.43
  9. Kevin, 1-1, 179.72
  10. Richie, 1-1, 168.94
  11. Mike R., 0-2, 203.27
  12. Pulley, 0-2, 189.41
  13. Rob, 0-2, 171.74
  14. Scott, 0-2, 165.59

Blingalytics Ratings

  1. Rabbit, 946
  2. Babel, 756
  3. Derrek, 725
  4. Dave, 696
  5. Schertz, 591
  6. Mike R., 513
  7. Ed, 499
  8. Matt, 464
  9. Pulley, 407
  10. Pat, 369
  11. Kevin, 329
  12. Rob, 264
  13. Richie, 233
  14. Scott, 209

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums

Rabbit's 167.50 is a top ten score in Blingaleague history and his own personal best.

Slapped Heartbeat

Pat made it two full seasons without getting his heartbeat slapped, but week 2's 70.04 has broken that streak.

Weekly MVP

Derrick Henry's 43.53 for Schertz was the high score for the week, but Aaron Jones's 37.10 for Ed actually swung the Gross brothers' matchup. Let's call this a tie.

Dud of the Week

Clyde Edwards-Helaire not only fumbled away a chance at victory for the Chiefs, he managed only 2.60 points for Kevin. Not a great output from the first pick of the second round.

Start of the Week / Misplay of the Week

Matt-Pulley was the only close game, and neither side made any choices that determined the outcome.

Pickup of the Week

Matt traded for Brandin Cooks at got 16.40 points.

Blessed Cahoots

Ed went from the highest-scoring loser to the lowest-scoring winner; he's lucky Rob had such a bad week.

Week 3 Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Live Commish (Ed, 1-1, 6th) vs. Harrison Hammers (Matt, 1-1, 7th)

Ed leads all-time series, 9-7.

This is a fairly underwhelming choice for Game of the Blingaweek on the surface, but it's one of only two matchups that doesn't include an 0-2 squad and it features two teams that just made a big trade.

Ed's the most average team through two weeks ever; his 0.9975 expected wins just barely edges 2010 Derrek (0.9959) and 2016 Dave (1.0050) in that department. But, he's in playoff position for the first time since week 3 of 2019, helped by the fact that he's faced an easier-than-average schedule for the first time since 2014.

Matt's off to a 1-1 start for the third straight year; given where he's ended up the past two seasons, he has no need to panic right now.

As for the actual matchup between the two teams, week 2's trade looms large. DeAndre Hopkins (@JAC) goes against one of the worst teams in the league for Ed, while Brandin Cooks (vs. CAR) faces a red hot defense for Matt.

Pick: Live Commish.

Other Blingamatches

Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 2-0, 1st) vs. The Vistas are Back (Pat, 1-1, 8th)

Rabbit leads all-time series, 12-3.

Rabbit is the opposite of Ed; his 1.89 expected wins make him the least average team after two weeks ever. He's also the first team to ever have a 90% win expectancy or better for each of his first two games (2019 Pulley was close, with two games at 89% or more). Rabbit's 0.946 expected winning percentage is his first over 0.300 at this point in the year since 2016 - when he turned an 0-2 start into a bye and a Blingabowl appearance.

Pat, like Matt, is 1-1 for the third straight year. That is where the Matt/Pat comparisons end.

Pat has Tyreek Hill (vs. LAC), which gives him a player that can go off for 30 points at any time. Unfortunately for him, though, Rabbit has four of those in Christian McCaffrey (@HOU), Tyler Lockett (@MIN), Cooper Kupp (vs. TAM), and Kyler Murray (@JAC).

Pick: Pralines & Dick.

Swift Justice (Babel, 2-0, 2nd) vs. Rob for Today (Rob, 0-2, 13th)

Rob leads all-time series, 9-7.

Babel's team might not be quite as good as Rabbit's so far, but his 1.51 expected wins does crack the top 20 of all time. He's also off to his best start in franchise history.

Meanwhile, Rob's off to his first 0-2 start since 2013, when he rallied to earn a bye.

The disparity in records makes this year's Dickran Duel less exciting than usual, but on paper it doesn't look to be a lopsided affair. Babel is stronger at RB, with Najee Harris (vs. CIN) and D'Andre Swift (vs. BAL), and TE, with Darren Waller (vs. MIA); Rob has the upper hand at QB, with Dak Prescott (vs. PHI), and WR, with Terry McLaurin (@BUF) and new acquisition Calvin Ridley (@NYG).

Pick: Swift Justice.

D's Nuts (Derrek, 2-0, 4th) vs. Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 0-2, 12th)

Pulley leads all-time series, 10-7.

Derrek is in playoff position after week 2 for the fifth straight season.

On the other side of this matchup, Pulley's impressive eight-year streak of strong starts has come to a crashing end.

This week, Pulley's QB (Aaron Rodgers (@SF)) is once again going up against a recent MVP (Patrick Mahomes II (vs. LAC)). His run of tough luck might just continue...

Pick: D's Nuts.

Super Bash Bros. (Dave, 2-0, 3rd) vs. DK Country (Richie, 1-1, 10th)

Richie leads all-time series, 5-4.

Dave is 2-0 with 1.39 expected wins, which certainly bucks his recent trend of horrible starts. It isn't unprecedented, though, as in both 2014 and 2017, Dave won his first two games even more impressively.

Richie's 0.47 expected wins through two weeks is disappointing, but it doesn't even crack his bottom three starts of all time.

Will Ezekiel Elliott (vs. PHI) turn Richie's season around? Will Dave finally get to start Justin Fields (@CLE) at QB, or will Kirk Cousins (vs. SEA) continue his hot start? Richie's top RB (Austin Ekeler (@KC)) has a great matchup, while Dave's (Alvin Kamara (@NE)) has a tough one; is that enough for me to predict an upset?

Pick: DK Country.

The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 1-1, 9th) vs. Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 0-2, 11th)

Mike R. leads all-time series, 8-6.

Kevin has followed up his Sanderson Cup win with his worst start by expected wins in franchise history.

Mike is off to his fourth 0-2 start in the last six years. The good news for him is that this season, he has the highest expected wins mark of that quartet; could he be looking at another 2019, where he turned an 0-2 start into playoff victory?

Davante Adams (@SF) and D.J. Moore (@HOU) have been great for Kevin so far, but he should be worried about Josh Allen (vs. WAS) and Clyde Edwards-Helaire (vs. LAC) underperforming. Mike relies on Travis Kelce (vs. LAC) more than anyone else, and has gotten some under-the-radar strong games from Chris Godwin (@LAR).

Pick: Bernie's Bullies.

schertzopotamus (Schertz, 1-1, 5th) vs. Where's My State Farm Discount (Scott, 0-2, 14th)

Schertz leads all-time series, 2-1.

Like clockwork, Schertz is 0.500 or better in both actual and expected winning percentage after two weeks. This season's 1.18 expected wins figure is actually below median for him.

That 1.18 equals the personal best for Scott, who is off to his worst start in franchise history.

If week 2 Derrick Henry (vs. IND) shows up, Schertz should cruise. But if the week 1 version does, this could be a competitive game.

Pick: schertzopotamus.

Closing Thoughts

The first two weeks this season have both cracked the top 50 of all-time when it comes to average score, and week 2's average margin of victory was among the 20 highest ever.