The Sanderson Gazette - 2021-10-13 - Such Great Heights

Let's get this out of the way first: week 5's average score of 118.07 is now the highest of all time.

Week 5 Recap

Matt def. Rob, 172.33-87.89

Our Monster Heel becomes the first franchise to break 170 more than once in the regular season (he already had a second when you count the posteason). It looked really unlikely he'd hit that benchmark prior to Monday night, but Lamar Jackson (45.30) and Mark Andrews (35.60) put together a dual performance for the ages. Mike Williams added 34.00.

Rob got 19.60 from Antonio Gibson.

Schertz def. Rabbit, 148.53-112.78

Schertz probably went to bed Sunday thinking he had Team Blangums locked up thanks to his own QB-WR duo (Tom Brady (40.85) and Mike Evans (27.07)) and Derrick Henry (31.00). He'll have to settle for a big win over a strong opponent. Rabbit got 28.67 from Marquise Brown in the Monday night shootout, but Kyler Murray (15.05) and Tyler Lockett (7.60) disappointed.

Pulley def. Pat, 108.34-107.40

Pulley had to sweat out his first win until the final minutes of Sunday night football, when Tyreek Hill (9.90) fell just short of leading Pat to a comeback victory. Pulley got 28.53 from Antonio Brown and 22.00 from Courtland Sutton in his triumph.

Richie def. Mike R., 135.53-121.31

Richie gave it his all, but couldn't win his third straight Team Blangums; he'll take the third straight win as a consolation prize. Austin Ekeler (29.67), Ja'Marr Chase (27.20), DK Metcalf (25.07), and Ezekiel Elliot (23.27) all put up great scores to make up for Sam Darnold's 6.35. Mike got an exciting 25.90 from Kadarius Toney and 20.63 from James Robinson, but took yet another tough loss (more on that later).

Babel def. Derrek, 118.05-106.90

Yes, this week was crazy enough that the matchup in which two 4-0 teams both broke 100 fell to fifth in the recap order! Babel got solid performances all around, with Najee Harris (20.87) as his high scorer, and had a big lead going into Monday night. Jonathan Taylor (32.77) did his best to get D the comeback, but it was not meant to be.

Kevin def. Ed, 137.65-99.24

Josh Allen's 39.65 would have been sufficient for Kevin to win with just some average support, but he added 33.47 from Davante Adams and 21.83 from Kareem Hunt. Ed got another strong game from Jalen Hurts (23.90) and finally a good one from DeAndre Hopkins (17.60), but he fell to 1-4 on the year.

Dave def. Scott, 120.65-76.54

Dave saw Alvin Kamara (25.90) and Kyle Pitts (21.87) live up to their draft cost. Scott saw Nick Chubb (23.30) do the same, but the rest of his team was much worse.

Trades

Trade between Ed and Scott

Ed received:

  • Allen Robinson II - from Scott - keeper cost: 2nd

Scott received:

  • DeVonta Smith - from Ed - keeper cost: 4th

Another one-to-one trade of WRs between Scott and Ed. Scott is already looking towards keepers (more on his team later), while Ed is gambling that Robinson returns to historical form as Justin Fields gains experience.

So far, Scott has gotten the better end, though neither player wowed (Smith outscored Robinson 10.27-4.27 in week 5).

Standings

  1. Babel, 5-0, 604.06
  2. Derrek, 4-1, 591.01
  3. Richie, 4-1, 584.53
  4. Schertz, 4-1, 581.12
  5. Kevin, 4-1, 553.88
  6. Rabbit, 3-2, 619.73
  7. Matt, 3-2, 547.49
  8. Dave, 3-2, 469.33
  9. Mike R., 1-4, 566.23
  10. Pat, 1-4, 501.51
  11. Ed, 1-4, 487.52
  12. Rob, 1-4, 466.40
  13. Pulley, 1-4, 459.07
  14. Scott, 0-5, 374.55

Blingalytics Ratings

  1. Derrek, 719
  2. Babel, 704
  3. Rabbit, 655
  4. Mike R., 638
  5. Richie, 607
  6. Schertz, 605
  7. Kevin, 551
  8. Matt, 470
  9. Pat, 467
  10. Ed, 415
  11. Dave, 406
  12. Rob, 346
  13. Pulley, 330
  14. Scott, 89

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums

Matt's 172.33 is the new high score for the year.

Slapped Heartbeat

Scott goes back-to-back here with a meager 76.54 points.

Weekly MVP

Lamar Jackson's 45.30 wasn't quite the highest score of the week (Justin Herbert had 45.80 for Pat), but it was close and the top mark for our Team Blangums winner.

Dud of the Week

It was injury-driven, but Kenny Golladay's zero resulted in Pat losing by less than a point.

Start of the Week

Pulley didn't let Courtland Sutton's injury situation concern him too much, and he was rewarded with 22.00 points.

Misplay of the Week

You could argue Pulley's the best choice here, sitting both Samaje Perine (15.10) and Joe Mixon (9.57) in favor of Chester Rogers (4.37), making his game closer than necessary... but he did still win.

Instead, his opponent, Pat will get this award for sitting Myles Gaskin's 24.37 and/or Zach Pascal's 6.40 in favor of Jamison Crowder's 5.20 and/or Miles Sanders's 5.30. Either of the former would have changed the outcome of this matchup.

Pickup of the Week

Mike R. lost his game, but his pickup of Kadarius Toney got him 25.90 points. (And, to prove he belongs on the Bullies, Toney prompted got injured.)

Blessed Cahoots

Pulley won a super tight game and got lucky that one of his opponent's player, Kenny Golladay, got injured early in his game and took a zero.

Pryor Play of the Week

Kyle Pitts (21.87) finally put up double digits for Dave.

Week 6 Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 3-2, 6th) vs. Super Bash Bros. (Dave, 3-2, 8th)

Rabbit leads all-time series, 11-3.

Through two weeks, it looked like Rabbit and Dave would both be playing for byes. Since then, they're each just 1-2 and now look up at five teams with more wins.

Some reasons for Rabbit's slide are correctable; Christian McCaffrey (vs. MIN) has been out for the last two-plus weeks, but should come back in week 6. Others are more concerning; Cooper Kupp (@NYG) and Tyler Lockett (@PIT) were never going to sustain their amazing production in the first few weeks of the season, so recent play could be the new normal. And then there's Kyler Murray (@CLE), who could definitely crack 30 points regularly, like he did in weeks 1-2, but could also be "just" a high-floor QB1, like he's been in weeks 3-5.

Dave's team has been considerably worse than Rabbit's, though - which is definitely a bad sign. Chase Claypool (vs. SEA) does stand to benefit from JuJu Smith-Schuster's injury, but Justin Fields (vs. GB) looks like he won't be fantasy gold just because he's starting now. Throw in Alvin Kamara and Kyle Pitts being on bye, and this pick is pretty easy.

Pick: Pralines & Dick.

Other Blingamatches

Swift Justice (Babel, 5-0, 1st) vs. The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 4-1, 5th)

Kevin leads all-time series, 7-6.

Babel's just our sixth 5-0 team ever. His top point total among those teams is a little misleading, given this year's high scoring environment, but he profiles a little more strongly that our previous two entries on the list. This week, he will be without his surprising top WR, Deebo Samuel (bye), but D'Andre Swift (vs. CIN) and Najee Harris (vs. SEA) give him a pair of RBs that rivals anyone else in the league.

Kevin is also without a surprising top player, Cordarelle Patterson (bye), but he still has his top WR, Davante Adams (@CHI). And Josh Allen (@TEN) has a pretty soft-looking matchup.

Pick: The Chocolate Donuts.

schertzopotamus (Schertz, 4-1, 4th) vs. Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 1-4, 9th)

Schertz leads all-time series, 5-4.

Schertz's current four game winning streak features Derrick Henry (vs. BUF) getting at least 28 carries per game. Analyzing the rest of his roster would still reach the conclusion that as Henry goes, so goes Schertz.

Mike R. has finished with the 5th best score or better in three of the five weeks so far (and has never done worse than 8th), but has a 1-4 record to show for it. He has the hardest strength of schedule (+58.2%) ever measured through five weeks, and the good news is that numbers two and three on that list, 2016 Rabbit and 2012 Babel, both made the Blingabowl.

The Gentleman's Tussle features two teams who are far apart in record but quite close in actual team quality. This is not an easy pick, and it might come down to which Tampa Bay WR - Mike Evans (@PHI) for Schertz or Chris Godwin (@PHI) for Mike R. - has a bigger game on Thursday night.

Pick: Bernie's Bullies.

D's Nuts (Derrek, 4-1, 2nd) vs. Rob for Today (Rob, 1-4, 12th)

All-time series tied, 9-9.

Our second rematch of the year looks a bit lopsided. Despite his week 5 loss, Derrek might still be the team to beat - especially if Jonathan Taylor (vs. HOU) picks up where he left off against an easy matchup. Patrick Mahomes II (@WAS) is still awesome, and Justin Jefferson (@CAR) and Diontae Johnson (vs. SEA) have been consistent producers.

Rob will be without Calvin Ridley (bye) again, which doesn't bode well as he tries to turn his season around from his worst start since 2010.

Pick: D's Nuts.

DK Country (Richie, 4-1, 3rd) vs. Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 1-4, 13th)

Pulley leads all-time series, 7-3.

Richie's on a hell of a run; his lowest score over the past three weeks is 134.52. Only 2010 Rabbit (weeks 8-11) and 2019 Pulley (weeks 1-3) have had three-game streaks that stayed above that mark. His trade for Ezekiel Elliott (@NE) started this run, as both he and fellow first round pick Austin Ekeler (@BAL) has been great recently.

Pulley's team is rough, though he did sneak away with a win this past week thanks to Antonio Brown (@PHI). Joe Mixon (@DET) has a nice matchup and looks to be healthy again, but it'll be tough to pull the upset against a team as hot as Richie.

Fun fact: this is the first time that these two will play with Richie ranked higher in the standings.

Pick: DK Country.

Harrison Hammers (Matt, 3-2, 7th) vs. Where's My State Farm Discount (Scott, 0-5, 14th)

Scott leads all-time series, 2-1.

Just like that, Matt went from a middle-tier Blingaleague team to, well, a middle-tier Blingaleague team that showed it can still put the beatdown on anyone. Lamar Jackson (vs. LAC) and Mark Andrews (vs. LAC) had been merely good until week 5; if this is the new normal, Matt could very well make his fourth straight Blingabowl appearance.

Now let's talk about Scott. He's not the worst team ever through five weeks, but when the only team with fewer expected wins through five weeks opened the season with five straight Slapped Heartbeats, well, you have a very bad team. A team that, if anything, got worse last week; Russell Wilson and JuJu Smith-Schuster are now both out for at least a few weeks.

Pick: Harrison Hammers.

The Vistas are Back (Pat, 1-4, 10th) vs. Live Commish (Ed, 1-4, 11th)

Ed leads all-time series, 8-4.

Pat's team is a little better than his record, but he's just about as close to 0-5 as he is to 2-3; while he lost by less than a point this past week, he also won by less than three in week 1. Justin Herbert (@BAL) has thrust himself into the NFL MVP conversation, but unless Tyreek Hill (@WAS) starts scoring in double figures against teams other than Mike R., Pat will quickly have nothing left to play for.

Ed has also come about his 1-4 record honestly - his lone win is in his third highest scoring game - but his roster looks a little more hopeful than Pat's. Jalen Hurts (vs. TAM) is in no one's MVP consideration, but he's been a strong fantasy QB. If A.J. Brown (vs. BUF), DeAndre Hopkins (@CLE), and Allen Robinson (vs. GB) start playing up to draft pedigree consistently, Ed could turn his season around. But if not, it'll be an eighth straight year missing the playoffs for the commish.

Pick: Live Commish.

Closing Thoughts

This would be a good time in the year for a "contender or pretender?" theme in the previews, but the league has separated itself by record pretty well so far. There are five teams that are 4-1 or better and six teams that are 1-4 or worse; there have never been so many at either end before. The last time we were anywhere close to this sort of spread was the 2012 expansion season, when there were four teams 4-1 or better and four 1-4 or worse.