The Sanderson Gazette - 2022-11-16 - A Fourteen-Way Tie?

Week 10 Recap

Dave def. Ed, 92.97-86.66

We'll start with the closest game of the week, which came down to Monday night. Ed's former legacy player (can you have a "former" legacy player?), A.J. Brown, may have been a double agent, putting up just 0.93 for Dave. But the Eagles defense (7.00) and Miles Sanders (5.40) were also unexpectedly bad, so Dave held on for the win.

Christian Kirk (26.00 for Ed) led all scorers in this one. Dave got 22.80 from Davante Adams and 21.87 from Cole Kmet.

Derrek def. Richie, 138.98-103.22

Patrick Mahomes II (34.45) scored more than 30 points for the third straight game (and fourth time in his last five), while Justin Jefferson (31.73) almost single-handedly beat the Bills. D also got 22.83 from Jonathan Taylor.

Richie saw Tua Tagovailoa score 26.25 and James Conner put up 21.17, but it wasn't enough to avoid the tough loss.

Schertz def. Rabbit, 128.85-99.04

What's this?! Rabbit's team put up an average score?! Tony Pollard (19.23) and Amon-Ra St. Brown (16.07) did better than expected for Rabs, but Tyreek Hill (11.87) and Jerry Jeudy (zero) did worse.

But it didn't matter, as Schertz ended his five game losing streak in style. Justin Fields put up 39.55 and Aaron Jones scored 22.20 to push Schertz back into the playoff conversation.

Scott def. Babel, 118.68-80.65

Scott made quick work of Babel behind CeeDee Lamb (32.00), D'Onta Foreman (19.00), DeAndre Carter (14.53), and Dalton Schultz (13.20). Babel got a surprising 11.73 from Foster Moreau, but remains mired in last place.

Matt def. Rob, 99.98-77.17

Matt ended his two game Slapped Heartbeat run by coming as close to 100 points exactly as anyone had before. It's fitting that most of his team performed close to their projections, with Jalen Hurts (23.05) coming in just under his and Saquon Barkley (22.27) outpacing his by just over five points.

Rob, for the second straight week, put up his lowest score of the year - this time by more than twenty points! Having to play Andy Dalton (7.80) at QB was a big part of that, but Jaylen Waddle (8.80) and Zach Ertz (1.60) also came in well below expectations.

Mike R. def. Pat, 104.94-78.13

Marvin Mike's hardass persona willed the Bullies to another win; Dalvin Cook (21.50) and Jeff Wilson, Jr. (21.10) were especially motivated. Pat got 17.53 from Josh Jacobs and 14.00 from the Titans defense, but the rest of his team disappointed.

Pulley def. Kevin, 67.57-52.19

Finally, we come to our worst game of the week. Only Aaron Rodgers (20.60) and Chris Godwin (15.47) hit double figures for Pulley, but that was more than enough to beat Kevin. While Trevor Lawrence (21.05) was the overall high scorer in this one, Cooper Kupp's -0.13 and George Kittle's 2.80 sealed Kevin's fate.

Trades

Trade between Ed and Pulley

Ed received:

  • Miles Sanders - from Pulley - keeper cost: 3rd

Pulley received:

  • Cordarrelle Patterson - from Ed - keeper cost: 5th
  • Greg Dulcich - from Ed - keeper cost: 9th

Did Ed win a trade?! Sanders scored just 5.40 in a close loss, so not really, but the commish certainly didn't lose this deal. That's because Patterson (2.07) and Dulcich (1.47) scored less than four points combined.

Trade between Ed and Pulley

Ed received:

  • Matt Gay - from Pulley - keeper cost: 9th

Pulley received:

  • Robbie Gould - from Ed - keeper cost: 9th

If the 49ers had gone for it late, scored a TD, and kicked the extra point, Gay and Gould would have both finished with 5.60 points. Instead, Kyle Shanahan opted for a 20 yard field goal, so Gould put up 6.60 instead.

It's sad that both these kickers outscored the three other players Pulley and Ed exchanged last week.

Standings

  1. Rob, 7-3, 1,081.98
  2. Scott, 6-4, 1,102.28
  3. Derrek, 6-4, 1,069.19
  4. Mike R., 6-4, 956.26
  5. Ed, 5-5, 1,054.03
  6. Dave, 5-5, 1,042.17
  7. Matt, 5-5, 1,006.56
  8. Kevin, 5-5, 974.92
  9. Rabbit, 5-5, 970.75
  10. Pulley, 5-5, 871.93
  11. Schertz, 4-6, 1,098.96
  12. Richie, 4-6, 888.32
  13. Pat, 4-6, 861.23
  14. Babel, 3-7, 849.29

Blingalytics Ratings

  1. Rob, 663
  2. Scott, 637
  3. Schertz, 606
  4. Derrek, 602
  5. Dave, 601
  6. Ed, 584
  7. Matt, 515
  8. Kevin, 498
  9. Rabbit, 484
  10. Mike R., 460
  11. Richie, 361
  12. Pulley, 344
  13. Pat, 326
  14. Babel, 317

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums

Derrek's 138.98 is good for his second Team Blangums of the year.

Slapped Heartbeat

Kevin's 52.19 is our new yearly low. Joe Mixon scored more points for Kevin by himself last week.

Weekly MVP

Justin Fields's 39.55 for Schertz will take this award home.

Dud of the Week

Clyde Edwards-Helaire put up zero for Ed, but Cooper Kupp dipped into the negative with -0.13 for Keivn. The latter will win this one.

Start of the Week

Dave rolled the dice and started Cole Kmet as a second tight end (in one of his flex spots); 21.87 points later, he earned a big win.

Misplay of the Week

Ed could have played Jaylen Warren's 9.03 over Clyde Edwards-Helaire's zero and defeated Dave.

Pickup of the Week

See "Start of the Week".

Blessed Cahoots

Pulley had the second worst total of the week, but won comfortably. That's the kind of situation this award was made for.

Pryor Play of the Week

Kmet won't win here, as he hasn't been doing nothing on Dave's roster all year. Instead, it goes to Jonathan Taylor, whose 22.83 is his first double digit performance since week 1.

Playoff Scenarios

No one can clinch a playoff spot this week. In fact, Rob can still finish in last place!

That's right - thanks to the good folks at Fantasy Football Hub, where you can play out the rest of the season game-by-game, The Gazette has confirmed that we can wind up with a fourteen-way tie at 7-7 this year! (Shout out to Rob for discovering this.)

So if you're a fan of chaos, you'll want to root for Babel, Dave, Ed, Kevin, Pat, and Schertz this week. Yes, that's only six, because the Mike R./Rabbit outcome can go either way and still allow for a 7-7 apocalypse down the line.

Week 11 Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

Mostly Three Digit FC (Scott, 6-4, 2nd) vs. Super Bash Bros. (Dave, 5-5, 6th)

Dave leads all-time series, 3-1.

Scott's leading the league in points, so this week won't impact his playoff chances too much (unless he completely bottoms out). It is much bigger for Dave, though, as he'll fall to at best 7th place - behind the winner of Ed/Pulley and Matt/Kevin - should he lose.

D'Onta Foreman (@BAL) and CeeDee Lamb (@MIN) have been great midseason acquisitions for Scott, and look to continue that this week. Kyler Murray (vs. SF) and Ezekiel Elliott (@MIN) should both also be back. If Deebo Samuel (@ARI) can approach his 2021 production again, Scott's already scary team could reach a new level.

Dave has a couple great WRs, Davante Adams (@DEN) and A.J. Brown (@IND), who are hit-or-miss lately. Travis Kelce (@LAC), however, is all-hit; only once has he scored less than 13 points this year. If Justin Herbert (vs. KC) can approach his 2021 production again, Dave's already feisty team could turn into a scary one.

Pick: Mostly Three Digit FC will ruin our fourteen-way tie dream/nightmare.

Other Blingamatches

D's Nuts (Derrek, 6-4, 3rd) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 4-6, 11th)

Derrek leads all-time series, 7-4.

For the second year in a row, Derrek has hit a new gear in week 8. Patrick Mahomes II (@LAC) has been ridiculously great lately, Justin Jefferson (vs. DAL) has been a star all year, and DeAndre Hopkins's (vs. SF) return from suspension has been a huge boost, too. If Jonathan Taylor (vs. PHI) is back to his 2021 form, could D emerge as the favorite yet again?

Schertz struck gold with Justin Fields (@ATL), making Lamar Jackson (vs. CAR) a little redundant. Stefon Diggs (vs. CLE) has been his usual great self and Aaron Jones (vs. TEN) has mostly been worth his first round draft cost. Tyler Lockett being on bye might make Schertz's playoff chances take a huge hit, as a seventh loss would be a big problem.

Pick: D's Nuts ensures we won't have utter chaos in the standings.

Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 6-4, 4th) vs. Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 5-5, 9th)

Rabbit leads all-time series, 8-7.

Mike's been here before, in 2015 - a team that wouldn't win any points tiebreakers, but squeezed out enough wins for that not to matter. And now, his formerly-decrepit WR corps could get suddenly better with Allen Robinson II (@NO) poised to take advantage of Cooper Kupp's injury. It's not a huge boon, exactly, but adding it to Derrick Henry (@GB) and Dalvin Cook (vs. DAL) might be enough to carry Mike into the playoffs.

It helps that Rabbit will be without Tyreek Hill (bye) this week, and that Christian McCaffrey (@ARI) seems to be in a split backfield situation on his new team, and that Tony Pollard's (@MIN) competition for carries is back this week, and that Gabriel Davis (vs. CLE) might be playing in a snowstorm. Oof, that's a lot of things working against Rabs.

Pick: Bernie's Bullies, though this result won't impact the fourteen-way tie potential.

Harrison Hammers (Matt, 5-5, 7th) vs. The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 5-5, 8th)

Kevin leads all-time series, 11-6.

Matt turned his season around in week 10, though he isn't quite in playoff position again. Saquon Barkley (vs. DET) is a great reason to think he'll get there soon, though. Jalen Hurts (@IND) also put up a solid score despite the Eagles underperforming, too, so he shouldn't cause any worry. And hey, Mark Andrews (vs. CAR) should be back, too!

Kevin has lost Cooper Kupp for the year, which is a pretty huge hit. Trevor Lawrence (bye) is also unavailable this week. Joe Mixon (@PIT) and Rhamondre Stevenson (vs. NYJ) are back, but it's hard not to assume Kevin's days as a contender are over.

Pick: Harrison Hammers completely snuffs out the chances of an everyone's-tied apocalypse.

Live Commish (Ed, 5-5, 5th) vs. Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 5-5, 10th)

All-time series tied, 7-7.

It looked like Ed would make his long-overdue return to the playoffs this year, but a loss in week 11 could put a big damper on that. Josh Allen (vs. CLE) was healthy enough to look normal last week, but might have to deal with a snowstorm this one. New acquisition Diontae Johnson (vs. CIN) might need to have a big game to offset the bye weeks of Mike Evans, Christian Kirk, and Leonard Fournette if the commish wants to stay .500 or better.

Pulley faces some bye week challenges from Travis Etienne, Jr. and Chris Godwin, as well. Cordarrelle Patterson (vs. CHI) was a huge disappointment in his first game for the MondoSquad, but does get a great matchup this week. Thursday night could be key for Pulley's success; duds from Aaron Rodgers (vs. TEN) and Allen Lazard (vs. TEN) could torpedo his chances of moving to 6-5.

Pick: Live Commish does its part to bring about the fourteen-way tie.

Rob for Today (Rob, 7-3, 1st) vs. The Vistas are Back (Pat, 4-6, 13th)

Rob leads all-time series, 11-2.

Rob's on a two-game skid, but remains in first place. Nick Chubb (@BUF) and Terry McLaurin (@HOU) will do their best to make sure "for now" doesn't need to be added to the previous sentence with Jaylen Waddle on his bye. Joe Burrow's (@PIT) return does make Rob a clear favorite here, though.

Pat has Marcus Mariota (vs. CHI) going in a solid matchup. Josh Jacobs (@DEN) rebounded from a rough stretch last week. That's all probably not enough to beat Rob, though.

Pick: Rob for Today clinches eight wins for at least one team.

DK Country (Richie, 4-6, 12th) vs. Swift Justice (Babel, 3-7, 14th)

Babel leads all-time series, 7-4.

Technically, neither of these guys is out of the playoff hunt. Technically.

Pick: DK Country wins and clinches eight losses for at least one team.

Closing Thoughts

Reminder: the trade deadline is week 12. That means players can be traded up until kickoff of their games next week.