The Sanderson Gazette - 2024-10-02 - Monday Night Mayhem

Week 4 Recap

Rabbit def. Schertz, 112.01-104.70

This was one of two games (and one award) that came down to the duo of Monday night games. Heading into the final few hours of the week, Schertz led 89.46-88.27. But Jameson Williams (16.67) and Sam LaPorta (7.07) outscored DK Metcalf (11.87) and De'Von Achane (3.37), pushing Rabbit to victory.

Outside of the Monday night players, Rabbit was led by Lamar Jackson (24.70) and Younghoe Koo (21.70). Schertz got 16.73 from Kyren Williams and 15.73 from Xavier Worthy.

Ed def. Matt, 86.52-72.20

This one also came down to Monday night, where Ed entered with a modest lead. It didn't matter what the Lions defense (7.00) scored for the commish, as Tyreek Hill put up just 4.97 for Matt. Ed can thank his Commanders, Jayden Daniels (26.35) and Brian Robinson, Jr. (17.70), for putting him a position to win. Matt can point to Rome Odunze (1.33) in addition to Hill as reasons for his loss.

Mike R. def. Dave, 136.88-69.73

The Bullies made a statement win, with Jared Goff (27.83), Jordan Mason (23.23), Alvin Kamara (19.30), and Mike Evans (18.53) making the most noise. Dave got 17.33 from Justin Jefferson, but also suffered through another zero from Mark Andrews and just 1.20 from Alec Pierce.

Kevin def. Rob, 136.75-112.42

Kevin scored a huge upset, with the 49ers defense (24.00), Jordan Addison (22.30), and Jahmyr Gibbs (19.80) leading the way. Rob took a tough loss with D'Andre Swift (24.90) and CeeDee Lamb (19.87) as his top scorers.

Pat def. Pulley, 108.54-87.50

Pat bounced back from his devastating loss last week with a solid win. It was Derrick Henry (33.23) who again paced the Vistas. Diontae Johnson (17.07) looks like the real thing for Pulley, but he's not going to win many games getting 5.60 from Matthew Stafford and zero from Josh Reynolds.

Derrek def. Scott, 104.27-53.28

Derrek finally broke through for a good point total, powered by C.J. Stroud (25.95) and Jayden Reed (24.73). Scott had more zeroes (C.J. Watson and Kyle Pitts) than double digit scorers (David Montgomery (15.33)).

Babel def. Richie, 92.33-69.67

Babel made quick work of Richie in a battle between 2-1 teams. Nico Collins (26.13) was great for the winner, while Garrett Wilson (3.47) was a big dud for the loser.

Trades

Trade between Ed and Rabbit

Ed received:

  • Marvin Harrison, Jr. - from Rabbit - keeper cost: 1st
  • Jaylen Waddle - from Rabbit - keeper cost: 2nd

Rabbit received:

  • Jonathan Taylor - from Ed - keeper cost: 1st
  • Brian Thomas, Jr. - from Ed - keeper cost: 7th

This was a pretty simple trade; Ed was strong and RB, while Rabbit was strong at WR, so they decided to make a swap.

Taylor put up 17.47, which was better than Harrison's 12.00, though both sides won their game this week. For now, this looks like a win-win with a tilt in Rabbit's favor, but if Taylor's ankle injury causes him to miss games, it could swing the other way.

Standings

  1. Rob, 3-1, 438.97
  2. Rabbit, 3-1, 430.86
  3. Pat, 3-1, 409.89
  4. Babel, 3-1, 392.97
  5. Mike R., 2-2, 453.39
  6. Ed, 2-2, 408.02
  7. Schertz, 2-2, 407.07
  8. Scott, 2-2, 398.55
  9. Dave, 2-2, 362.48
  10. Richie, 2-2, 356.41
  11. Derrek, 2-2, 320.86
  12. Kevin, 1-3, 397.40
  13. Pulley, 1-3, 340.88
  14. Matt, 0-4, 310.10

Blingalytics Ratings

  1. Rob, 711
  2. Mike R., 679
  3. Rabbit, 674
  4. Scott, 602
  5. Schertz, 578
  6. Pat, 568
  7. Ed, 545
  8. Babel, 508
  9. Kevin, 505
  10. Dave, 391
  11. Richie, 387
  12. Pulley, 313
  13. Derrek, 304
  14. Matt, 233

Weekly Awards

Team Blangums

Kevin looked like he had this locked up heading into Monday night, and Jahmyr Gibbs even added 19.80 to push him to 136.75 total. But a late and wholly unnecessary touchdown from Tony Pollard (17.47), as well as a late touchdown from Jared Goff (27.83) to Amon-Ra St. Brown (16.35) catapulted Mike and his 136.88 to the top spot.

This is the sixth closest margin between Team Blangums and the second highest score of the week ever. Look how much Mike is involved in close Blangums!

  1. Week 9, 2018, 0.01 (Mike R. over Schertz)
  2. Week 8, 2012, 0.03 (Mike R. over Matt)
  3. Week 8, 2018, 0.10 (Derrek over Scott)
  4. Week 5, 2008, 0.12 (Allen over Pulley)
  5. Week 2, 2014, 0.13 (Pulley over Mike R.)
  6. Week 4, 2024, 0.13 (Mike R. over Kevin)
  7. Week 2, 2018, 0.22 (Mike R. over Rob)
  8. Week 9, 2008, 0.27 (Kevin over Babel)
  9. Week 10, 2023, 0.50 (Scott over Babel)
  10. Week 14, 2023, 0.54 (Pulley over Matt)

Slapped Heartbeat

Scott's 53.28 was the low score this week by a comfortable margin. It also marks the eighth time the Slapped Heartbeat team had the most points in the league heading into their game:

Weekly MVP

Jared Goff caught a touchdown pass on his way to 27.83 for Mike R.

Dud of the Week

Kyle Pitts put up a healthy zero for Scott.

Start of the Week

Rabbit chose Christian Kirk (14.13) over Romeo Doubs (5.20) and won by less than that margin. (Sure, he had a couple other high scores on his bench, but he still made this critical decision.)

Misplay of the Week

If Matt had played Baker Mayfield's 31.35 over Brock Purdy's 17.00, he'd have won by 0.03 points.

Pickup of the Week

Richie's score would have been even worse if he hadn't added Tutu Atwell and his 10.93 points.

Pryor Play of the Week

Travis Kelce's 11.87 doesn't look like much, but it was more than he had in the first three weeks combined for Babel.

Runner-up: D'Andre Swift, who scored 24.90 for Rob after failing to break the 5.00 barrier up until this point.

D'Ernest D'oh

Matt picked up Dontayvion Wicks but left his 22.40 on his bench.

Week 5 Preview

Game of the Blingaweek

The Vistas are Back (Pat, 3-1, 3rd) vs. Bernie's Bullies (Mike R., 2-2, 5th)

Mike R. leads all-time series, 12-6.

Does that say "3rd" next to Pat's name? He's never been that high in the standings at this point in the season. In fact, the last time he was in third place from week four on was way back in his very first year. At this point in his #PlayoffPat run, he was 1-3 and in last place!

This year, it's fair to say that Derrick Henry (@CIN) and Malik Nabers (@SEA) were excellent picks. Add Kenneth Walker III (vs. NYG) and Aaron Jones (vs. NYJ) to the mix, and you have the recipe for a return to the playoffs, and maybe even a win once there... if Caleb Williams (vs. CAR) can start delivering at QB.

Mike also looks poised for a deep run, having banked two Blangums already. This is also the third time in the past four years that he's had 440 points or more at this point in the season. (Though his championship season was the one season left out, and came in well below that mark.)

Alvin Kamara (@KC) has been very valuable, and Chuba Hubbard (@CHI) has looked great since Bryce Young was benched. If Mike Evans (@ATL) can consistently score like he did last year, Mike should be favored to make the playoffs.

Pick: The Vistas are Back.

Other Blingamatches

Live Commish (Ed, 2-2, 6th) vs. schertzopotamus (Schertz, 2-2, 7th)

Schertz leads all-time series, 9-4.

Ed's season profiles as only a little above average, and that's reflected in his 2-2 record - the first time in three years he hasn't been 3-1 at this time! His last three games have all come down to Monday night, but this week it he should be done on Sunday based on his lineup. Jayden Daniels and Brian Robinson, Jr. (both vs. CLE) are among the noon games, and Breece Hall (@MIN) even plays at 8:30 in the morning!

Schertz can top Ed in one way: he hasn't been at .500 or below after four weeks in four years. He'll be dealing with Jalen Hurts's bye this week, but he drafted Justin Fields (vs. DAL) in part for this very moment. DK Metcalf (vs. NYG) has been rock solid, and Kyren Williams (vs. NO) has been great so far. If De'Von Achane (@NE) can get going once again vs. the Patriots, Schertz should climb back above .500.

Fun fact: the winner of this game will pull to .500 overall (Ed is currently 107-108, Schertz 81-82).

Pick: schertzopotamus.

Pralines & Dick (Rabbit, 3-1, 2nd) vs. The Chocolate Donuts (Kevin, 1-3, 12th)

Rabbit leads all-time series, 10-7.

Rabbit isn't off to as hot a start as last year, but his 3-1 record and other metrics compare favorably to his 2021 team, which made the Blingabowl. This year, he's been led by Lamar Jackson (@CIN), who's got a good matchup, and Rashee Rice, who might have torn his ACL last week. If Jonathan Taylor (@JAC) also misses time, Rabbit's future is up in the air; if not, he looks like a solid contender.

Kevin is below .500 for the second straight year at this point after avoiding that fate for nine years in a row. He did just pull a big upset, but one of his key players, Jahmyr Gibbs, is now on bye. Ja'Marr Chase (vs. BAL) has been great the past two weeks, though, and Jordan Addison (vs. NYJ) came back from his injury in a big way in week four. Kevin's got a shot, here, even if it's not a particularly good one.

Pick: Pralines & Dick.

Rob for Today (Rob, 3-1, 1st) vs. Let him Cook! (Scott, 2-2, 8th)

Rob leads all-time series, 6-1.

A week ago, this matchup looked like it would be the marquee game of the week. But both of these guys took a loss last week, with Scott's being especially bad. So now instead of being 4-0, Rob sits at 3-1 for the third straight year, and eighth time in the past eleven! D'Andre Swift (vs. CAR) finally broke out and gets a juicy matchup this week. CeeDee Lamb and Dak Prescott (both @PIT) have a tough one, but are also CeeDee Lamb and Dak Prescott, so they'll probably be just fine.

Someday, Scott will be over .500 after four weeks. In week five, his team namesake, James Cook (@HOU) will look to bounce back from his first low score of the year. He's also making a switch at QB, where Jordan Love (@LAR) is slotted into his lineup. I'd say we'll know a lot about how this will go after Thursday night, where Scott will have Tyler Allgeier (vs. TAM) and Cade Otton (@ATL) going, but we probably already know enough with Scott being forced to start those two.

Pick: Rob for Today.

Keep Calm & Keon (Babel, 3-1, 4th) vs. Double Digits (Dave, 2-2, 9th)

Babel leads all-time series, 13-5.

Babel's a quiet 3-1; I think we're just used to him being 4-0 at this point to take much notice of his season so far. Josh Allen (@HOU) figures to bounce back from a downer of a week, while Nico Collins (vs. BUF) and James Conner (@SF) look to continue their strong seasons. But will Brandon Aiyuk (vs. ARI) ever hit double digits?

Speaking of Double Digits, Dave is 2-2, as usual. He has one really good score, but has failed to break 90 three times. Similarly, he's had Justin Jefferson (vs. NYJ) as one stellar performer all year, but also has Mark Andrews (@CIN), who's been legendarily bad, and Kyler Murray (@SF), who has one great week and three bad-to-middling ones.

Pick: Keep Calm & Keon.

Ed Gross (Richie, 2-2, 10th) vs. D's Nuts (Derrek, 2-2, 11th)

Derrek leads all-time series, 9-3.

Here are a couple of surprising 2-2 teams. Both of them are following up on 0-4 starts, so that's nice. But both are also averaging less than 90 points per game.

Richie has Joe Burrow (vs. BAL), Derrek has C.J. Stroud (vs. BUF). Richie has Garrett Wilson (@MIN), Derrek has Travis Etienne, Jr. (vs. IND).

Pick: D's Nuts.

Pullman's MondoSquad (Pulley, 1-3, 13th) vs. Harrison Hammers (Matt, 0-4, 14th)

Matt leads all-time series, 9-8.

"I know our teams are nothing spectacular, but Pulley and I don't get a preview?" - Matt, September 21, 2011

Matt said the above quote when the preview of a matchup between 10th place him and 12th place Pulley was unintentionally left out of an old issue of The Gazette. As you can see, the same mistake has not been made again, despite each of them being about as bad as they have ever been.

Pick: Harrison Hammers.

Closing Thoughts

The average score across the league this year is 96.93. That's the lowest mark since 2017's 95.61, and the fourth lowest in league history. We should really try to turn that around.